This web page is dedicated to those who remind us that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.

11262 Home > CATEGORIES Accident Reports I was thrown from my car as it left the road, and was later found in a ditch by some stray cows. Ad Typos Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first! The Bible According to Kids Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients. Church Bulletins Tuesday at 4:00 p.m. there will be an Ice Cream Social. All ladies giving milk please come early. Courtroom Bloopers Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time? A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy. English Misuse in Signs From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: "When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigour." Family Feud Q: Name a famous bridge. A: The bridge over troubled waters. Foreign Brands Shitto (hot spiced pepper sauce, Ghana) Instruction Labels On Marks & Spencer bread pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." Newspaper Headlines William Kelly, 87, was Fed Secretary On the Beat "You can't outrun a radio." School Excuse Notes Irving was absent this morning because he missed his bust. Things Kids Say (Regarding some surefire ways to make a person fall in love with you) "Shake your hips and hope for the best."  - Camille, age 9 Welfare Requests I want money as quick as I can get it. I have been in bed with the doctor for two weeks and he doesn't do me any good. If things don't improve, I will have to send for another doctor. What the Doctors Wrote The patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days. Young Scientists Many dead animals of the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil.

Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12